Stranger Danger!

I was surfing the news yesterday..

Teen arrested for raping 5 yr old in Mcdonald's play area..
Father sentenced for injury to 8 week old baby..
Mother sentenced to 3 yrs in death of her 10 month old child...
Bergen county on alert for attempted abduction of middle schooler..

And I am taken aback by these news...sometimes we forget that there are really sickos out there, that sometimes we are so engrossed with out daily lives and basking in that false sense of security that we started to relax and it takes something like this for our "survival" and our "lioness nature" to come screeching and clawing to the forefront. But, what can we do? what can we do as parents? Will this justify wrapping our kids in bubble wrap and hiding them in a fireproof, tamper proof safe? I guess not, unless you want department of child services knocking on your door. What it all boils down to, is being vigilant. Not the paranoid-I-am-holding-a-shotgun-everytime-I-open-the door kind of vigilance. But rather, being aware of what is happening around you, especially when out with your kids. I always tell my husband,it only takes a minute, or a small window of opportunity and that flash of neglect, may result to a lifetime of regrets.

Just a few nuggets I collected..
1. Start talking to your child about their body, what is inappropriate touching, and
if he/she feels uncomfortable, tell your child to go to a trusted adult
2. Start training your child how to react to certain situations, run down scenarios
and what they should do. Examples are screaming for help and screaming that the
person trying to drag them away is not their father or mother
3. Make sure they memorize an emergency contact number and 911. We've heard of
stories of lives being saved coz a toddler knew how to diall 911
4. Never talk to strangers, never approach vehicles, a lot of perpertrators use
strategies like asking for directions, having puppies or pets, offering candy or
food
5. Teach your children not to open the door when somebody knocks or rings the
doorbell. Always remind them not to open the door without an adult present
6. When you are out and about with your kids,I know the sales tag on that dress says
70% off, but hey remember your little one running around? Maybe common sense,
keep an eye on your kid, but common sense in not that common after all.
7. Usually the school districts disseminates information with regards to persons of
interests or attempted abductions. Just the other day, a middle schooler from
Bergen county NJ was solicited on her way home from school, she was offered a
$1000 to get in the back of the SUV. Pay attention or school flyers or email
alerts, you never know it might save your child someday.

Children are precious, yeah they can be tiring and you get that day when you look at the mayhem and wished that you had tied your tubes. But still they are ours to protect and make their childhood last a little bit longer, before they grow up and the big bad world takes over. Be safe, be aware, be a fighter and not a victim

New Year, New PLace

It's already February 2010. Time goes by so fast, I wonder where January went? Did'nt have time to blog...so much has happened the last blog entry 12/11/09 that it feels like several lifetimes and I'm afraid to that when I look in the mirror I'm gonna see an old hag with white hair and whiskers on the chin. We sold our condo.(Yipeee!) found an apartment in 1 week, arranged moving, changing address and taking care of utilities, up to now, we still have several boxes stacked in the bedroom.I miss our condo. The nice, big kitchen with endless countertops, the bright and spacious living room. Cavernous closets. It's like downsizing but with 2 kids. I had made several trips to goodwill and St Barnabas already to drop off donations and toys. I cannot believe how much crap a family can accumulate in a few years. And the toys...oh my jumping crackers and salt...the toys! big and small, little parts of bigger toys. I used to take for granted the toys we have since we had a bigger space before, it was all spread out, but now in a smaller apartment, it is like the toys are taking over. It was just too much that I packed several boxes and put some away. I wish I could send it all to the Philippines, but the shipping cost will be worth more than the toys are worth. And besides some of the toys are missing a little -sumthing-sumthing so I can't really sell it on ebay. My daughter and I went through her stash, for each toy she wants to keep, she has to pick one to give away. Hopefully it teaches her about charity and to appreciate what she have. And with the toys she has chosen, I put away half so when she gets tired of the toys I put it, all I have to do is get some out of storage and it feels like a brand new toy. since goodwill will not accept children's toys anymore, I post a lot on stuff on freecycle. Another man's trash or rather woman's trash is another family's treasure. Besides, it feels better knowing that a well loved toy is going to someone who will also treasure it. Keeps it out of landfills and makes another child happy. Winner on both sides I say.

You definitely know...

1. It's time to lose weight when your mom looks like a teenager beside you, wears your pre-pegnancy pants and look good in it

2. It's time to start buying Mario B, skin care products even if it costs an arm and a leg..actually more like 2 arms and 2 legs..when they card you...for your senior citizen card and AARP card.

3. It's time to schedule botox and whatever dermatologic invention when they ask you if your mom is your daughter.

4. ..Or when they ask you if your husband is your son.

5. It's time to stop eating your kids leftovers when they start charging you 2 seats on the bus..or the train..or the airplane.

6. It's time to log in some vacation time, when all you can think about when you see your kids having their usual morning emotional breakdown...is that you could go back in time and have those damn tubes tied.

7. It's time to cut down on the shopping, when you can only afford Ramen noodles. For breakfast, lunch and dinner. Including midnight snacks.

8. It's time to sleep when you are sleepy. DUH

California Road trip..from San Francisco to Las Vegas

We left murky,damp and gloomy New York and landed in sunny California! Although I would not advise travelling with small children for health and mental reasons...we had no choice, unless we can check-in the little critters in a "kid hotel" like they do for pets for 1 week. We had 2 checked in bags and most of it was for the baby. The bottles, milk formulas, bottle sterilizer, little odds and ends, two strollers, two car seats...like I said, after this I need a vacation. Doing NOTHING. Some travellers don't care for young kids, they act like they were never little brats or maybe their parents never travelled with them. It's fun. Like the kind of fun you have in hell. We flew Delta. Cheap snacks, all of us squished like sardines in a can. In real estate lingo...quite cozy. My 3 year old twitching and bouncing around like she had coffee, steroids and candy...all at the same time. Finally she wound down and dropped to sleep, 30 min within landing!

Going through security was also another nightmare worth blogging about. I had to strip the children's shoes, coats, jackets, fold the strollers and the car seats on top of removing my own stuff and putting them in gray boxes. Going through security by yourself is already torture, but going through it with two babies in tow is beyond beyond beyond my imagined idea of hell. The worst thing is..when you get on the plane, it doesn't end there, it is just the start of a 6++ hour torture. I need a drink. But I can't. Need to be sober. Kinda jealous of my neighbors in the plane with earphones and drowning out the baby screams.

Keeping healthy this Flu season

It's kinda scary. You turn on the TV, and everything is about pain, death and the downward spiral of the economy. Sometimes I just have to steel myself, because as a mother, one should be informed of current events. Knowledge is power, information is key! As a mother, one should know what is happening around her, and not just who is dating who in Hollywood all the better to make informed decisions.

I have a lot of friends on facebook posting their dilemnas on the swine flu vaccine. To get? or not to get? (the vaccine)..that is the million dollar question. I try not to impose my will on anyone. But if someone asks, I will try to give my opinion, not just as a pediatric nurse, but also as a concerned and INFORMED mom. Like I said, information is key. ANd mind you, not just any information, the world wide web is a treasure chest of info, but there are also a bunch of sewage floating around. One has to dig and sort through the junk and get the golden nuggets of useful information that is reliable, proven and not hearsay or gossip.

So will I advise to vaccinate a child who is in the high risk group to get it? Yes. Even if the child is not high risk and the pediatrician offers it, I will still advise it. At this point in time, the pros outweigh the cons. I work in an area that exposes me to viruses most of the time. I don't want to bring it home. If 3 yrs from now, my family will turn into one of those characters from the movie "I am Legend", well...at least we didn't get the swine flu. Looking at the bright side, I probably won't care at that point in time. Some would counter that the government is encouraging it coz it's a conspiracy. Oh puleeze. Believe what you want. But I have seen really really sick kids, and it's not a picnic either.

Although I would have to post a disclaimer. I don't work for a pharmaceutical company, there ARE side effects of the vaccine. Getting the vaccine DOES NOT GUARANTEE that you will not get sick with flu since there are a lot of strains out there floating around and those little buggers are just eagerly awaiting being introduced to your nasal passages and mouth. But it would definitely decrease one's chances of being debilitatingly sick and passing it on to more vulnerable targets like pregnant women, children and those with underlying medical condition. I just heard the news. Another 19 children dead from the swine flu. Enough said. Go watch the news then

All Hallow's Eve

It's Halloween again, it's like Christmas for the kids and adults alike. I was the chaperon to several pre-teens and of course my own KK who is dressed up this year as Dora. She was insisting on dressing up as a princess, but I'm like NO NO NO! You will get more candy if you dress up as Dora! So I searched and got a Boots costume for the little sibling. I overestimated her growth rate so the costume was a little bigger..even after 2 months. I ordered the costume 2 months ago. That's how excited mommy was about this one night.

In the Philippines, I remember we did not celebrate the 31st of October, we stayed in the house and did not go out..at all. My mom would scare me with stories of the dead roaming and spirits a-haunting. And it was a solemn occasion for most. We visit our dead relatives, offer prayers and masses. The one time of the year that we come back, clean up the weeds from the headstones and whitewash tombs. Some enterprising kids make money by collecting the candle wax from the forgotten candles left by the well-meaning relatives, they sell it per kilo.

Over the years, it has evolved into a much festive holiday. The cemeteries are packed with people, visitors and hawkers. With radios blaring and tents set up, most had food and it's like one big party.

Initially when we first came to America, we did not participate in these activities but when the kids came, it is more for their benefit rather than us. So we walked..and walked...and walked. Knocked on houses, got treats and continued on. It is really heartening to see, despite all the turmoil in our country, that people do take time to participate in this occasion. It is not just the candy that they get, but most of the house owners wait outside and individually hands out the treats. They get enjoyment from seeing little kids and adults alike dressed in whatever their imaginations can conjure and like I said, for a few hours, forget about the depressing economy.

We walked for over 2 hours, and it was a workout. I was wearing a light vest over a long sleeved shirt and my shirt was soaked. I was carrying an Ikea recyclable bag where my little Dora dumps her haul when her pumpkin gets too heavy to carry. And we had to cut out our foraging coz it started to rain..HARD. It sucks. But maybe deep inside I was thankful..I was tired and hungry and how much freaking candy can one eat? I grabbed Dora and ran for home. We got home, I ate a big plate of spaghetti, five pieces of garlic bread, and of course my lions share of the candy. So much for the calories I burned in the last two hours. I got it all back..with interest. Calories came back like a money lenders high interest rates.

We sorted the stash, I weeded away the small hard candies that can cause choking, took out the bubble gums and kept all the chocolate bars. After that it was trading time! All the cousins and aunts started trading and bartering for their least liked and favorite treats.

All in all, the next day, my daughter already forgot about her hoard, but I try to emphasize to her while we were trick or treating, to appreciate whatever someone gives. Small candy or big choco bar, the act of giving should be enough. Also always remind her to say "thank you" and of course sharing. There are values to be learned even during Halloween. It is not just horror movies and partying.

The holiday is over, costumes in the dirty laundry bin, pictures taken and posted and the candies hidden away, and parents all over the country heave a sigh of relief that their children came home safely, maybe a little sick from eating too much candy, but safe nonetheless. And me, getting that much needed sleep, coz I'm exhausted after that chaperoning bit. Now all that is over..time to plan for Christmas. I just love being a mom

Everybody is panicking, stores are running out of alcohol-based hand cleansers and bleach. I even saw on the news that somewhere in Maryland, thousands line up for the "swine flu" vaccine. What could a mother do?

Take a deep breath, and try to relax. I know it's hard when it's your children's health and life at stake. But, there are solutions and ways to get around this. Remember, PREVENTION is key. Although it is not 100%, it is still best way to avoid getting sick this season.

It's very hard to prevent kids from getting sick. But it doesn't mean that you will freak out everytime another kid cough and sneezes in your child's face. Not only impossible but also not practical. Unless you put your children in a bubble for let's say, till they are teenagers? That is crazy.

What to do:

Don't panic. Prevention is key. If there are small children in the family, all caregivers should get vaccinated. Especially if caring for "at risk" population 0-5 yrs of age. Or for people with underlying risk factors like asthma, diabetes, cardiac problems (which pretty much like half of the population already). And for some reason the virus targets pregnant women. Just get the damn vaccine!

Handwashing is very important. The virus can live on surfaces and can be infectious from up to 8 hours after being deposited on the surface. So whip up the cleansers and just wipe down kitchen counters, bathroom surfaces and I do clean door knobs, light switches, phones and cellphones. These items are the most used in the house and are often overlooked. Throw used tissues in the trash can and either wash your hands with soap and water or use hand sanitizers.

This is the flu season. I am not telling you to hibernate or hide away from the world. But if it's not necessary? avoid crowded places. Try not to bring your kids to a crowded mall or gatherings. Once in a while, yeah but, if you are bored and maybe having cabin fever then short trips will be enough. Good for the pocketbook too. They have hand sanitizers that are small enough and would fit right in your Prada or Coach bag. You don't have to be slouchy just because it's the flu season :P

If somebody does get sick. Just stay at home. Never mind the deadlines and whatever that needs to be done at the office. I am pretty sure the world will not end if you rest for a few days. Believe me, your co-workers will thank you for it. Spread the love..not the virus.

Avoid touching your nose, eyes and mouth. The virus is spread that way. WASH your hands I could never emphasize it enough.

If your kid does get sick, observe and give comfort and call your health provider. It may not be swine flu but regular old fashioned flu. As a mother, sometimes we dither whether to call or not to call. But trust your instincts, if you feel that something doesn't feel right? or the child looks worse to you? just follow it. Even if the doctor thinks you're crazy for calling in the middle of the night..hey that's what they are being paid for right? besides, I would rather be wrong and look crazy than have my child take a turn for the worse because I was afraid that the doc would think I am too paranoid. I'm a mother. I am supposed to be paranoid. I did not suffer and carry this child for nine months just to be pooh poohed by some doctor.

For more information click on the link. This will take you to the CDC website.
www.cdc.gov/H1N1flu/qa.htm

Better to be safe. Be informed. Call your health provider. Take all of this with a grain of salt. This is not meant to be a bible for swine flu prevention. But just a reminder. GET THAT FLU SHOT!!!!!!!!!!